192. Sexual Abuse and the MIR-Method
One in four girls and one in six boys (statistic accurate for the USA) will be involved with incest or sexual harassment before the age of 18. That is a huge number! Men as well as women can become victims, while the offenders are usually men. When you let those numbers sink in, you realize that it is inevitable that at least one person you know has been a victim of sexual abuse or violence. And… it’s strange that so little is said about it! There are still people who have been walking around for years with such a burdensome secret. And keeping secrets makes you sick. Victims often choose to keep quiet because they are afraid or ashamed or blame themselves. It is important to:
- Break the silence!
- Go to your primary care physician, who can provide you with professional help.
If, after reading this article you feel the need to speak with someone immediately, you can call the National Sexual Assault Telephone Hotline (USA) at 800-656-HOPE (4673), and they will connect you with a local sexual assault service provider in your area. For more information about the services provided and how they can help you, see www.rainn.org.
What is sexual abuse?
You are confronted with sexual touches or actions for which you have not given permission. That could be, for example, an “innocent” stroke over your buttocks or breasts or kiss on the mouth, but can also go further. When your body has been penetrated, no matter how, it’s rape. It’s good to know exactly what happened to you and whether law allows it or not. On the Wikipedia page about sexual assault, you will find sexual assault as defined by the United States Department of Justice as well as a list of specifications that the state of Texas has given of what this means. Unsolicited sexual acts within marriage are also punishable, but just try proving it!
Sexual abuse causes health problems. Bed wetting, skin rashes, nightmares, lung conditions and muscle problems, but also complaints for no clear reason such as fears, constant over-stimulation, submissive behavior, eating disorders, self-mutilation, chronic pain, forgetfulness and incontinence. Sexual abuse hits profoundly, damaging your sense of self-worth and your right to exist. It gives you the idea that you shouldn’t be here and that you don’t matter. That your body is not yours. That you can’t indicate what your boundaries are. If you don’t actively do something about it and deal with it, it will be a problem for you for the rest of your life.
Healing sexual abuse with the MIR-Method
The MIR-Method can support you in dealing with your trauma. Reliving decreases, emotions soften and your physical problems become less severe.
If you do the MIR-Method, you softly touch the skin of your hand. This is a large step, because touching yourself can be a huge challenge if your boundaries have physically been violated before. Give yourself time to get used to it and know that softly caressing your hand is an important form of healing because with it, you re-possess your body. With each touch you are really saying, “This is my body, and I’m making contact with it. I’m good to it.” You weren’t wrong, it wasn’t your fault, you can forgive yourself and you are allowed to be tender to yourself. This will already begin to cause healing.
Step 1: Optimize acidity improves the acidity in your body. In my practice, I saw that acidity is often disturbed when people had a problem with their fathers or other men, which is dealt with step 3: Detach father.
Step 2: Detox all toxicity takes care of getting rid of everything your body finds toxic. This can encompass quite a lot. From substances in the body all the way to toxic emotions from the offender or toxic images, words and smells that keep coming back to you.
Step 3: Detach father. Detach mother. Both men and women can be offenders. Detaching yourself from them is liberating. And you also detach the powerless family members who were aware of what was going on from this. And you also detach yourself from those family members who deny everything and don’t believe you. By breaking the emotional tie to them, you create great freedom. And often this leads to improvement in contact and openness.
Step 4: Clear meridians. The gall bladder, kidney, heart and circulation meridians can become blocked through unpleasant sexual experiences. And the lung and large intestine meridians have a direct link to your skin. When your skin has been touched against your will, it’s possible for fear of intimacy to develop. With step 4 you work on slowly erasing the disturbances.
Step 5: Supplement all shortages. Traumas can cause your cells to have more difficulty absorbing nutrients. By doing the MIR-Method, you take the old emotions out of your system, layer for layer, and the cells can open themselves up again. You will also notice that you slowly begin to choose healthier foods instead of only eating comfort food.
Step 6: Balance hormone system causes restoration in the imbalance that has come about through sexual abuse. Your chakra system can be seriously compromised by the horrible experiences and the chakra system and the hormone system are directly linked to one another.
Step 7: Fulfill basic needs helps you to strengthen your internal sense of security. You supplement your Self-worth, Respect for yourself and heal your ability for experiencing Intimacy and Touch. Through strengthening your ability to “Set boundaries”, you’ll find that people are less likely to ignore your boundaries.
Step 8: Optimize chakras and aura. Chakra 2 is especially disturbed when the sexual deeds took place in your pelvic area, either through penetration or groping. Chakra 5, your throat chakra, can become disturbed when the deeds took place in your face or mouth or when you were forced to keep silent, as in, “This is our little secret”. When chakra 5 is once again optimized, you become stronger about talking about what happened to you so you can make it stop or deal with it or can be there for someone else who is still struggling with it.
Step 9: Clarify mission. People who have been sexually abused have developed very sensitive antennas that they can learn to use to their advantage when assessing people, during job interviews, for example. Or they develop special abilities such as clairvoyance. Maybe it’s your mission to help others through the experiences you have had yourself. It demands a lot to listen to someone who has such an intense story, but your experiences are particularly valuable because the other person can clearly feel that you know what he/she is talking about.
My wish for you is that your body and emotions get the healing that they need!
P.S. Will you help spread the MIR-Method? You would do me a big favor by forwarding this article to other people! Feel free to post it to your Facebook page or send it via e-mail, Twitter or Linked-In! Use the icons on the left-hand side or below! Thank you!
P.S. Not familiar with the MIR-Method yet? Please go to the homepage. You can watch the video there and also the instruction video. Sign up for our newsletter and 6 weeks of coaching e-mails for extra support!
I have been abused by my Grandfather from an early age on, still wearing Pampers. It went on until I was 20 when he died. While he was in Hospital I could stand up against him for the very first time in my life. I will be 64 this year and still suffer from that Trauma.
Since I started the MIR-Method a few years ago, I am getting better, especially after the first 6 weeks I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. It is a long process.
I am very grateful to have found the MIR-Method.
My clients and I appreciate your leading edge work with these challenging issues.
That is so good to read! Give my kind wishes to them, wishing them lots of courage to deal with their past. If you can, could you maybe report any progress on this website? For instance, whether they become kinder to themselves, lose some of the shame, improving of self confidence, less reliving shocking situations…
And thank you for your wonderful work with your clients!
Greetings, Mireille Mettes